Carolyn Hax: A second child, demanding grandparents and a husband who’s had enough

They just invited us to their 40th anniversary dinner, no kids, and I’m resentful that I need to pay for a babysitter to hang out with them, when babysitting from them is so scant. They want us to go on vacations with them. And the thing is, aside from this kind of petty drama, we all get along! But seeing them takes a lot out of me — navigating all the scheduling and emotional demands from them and also talking my husband down when he gets frustrated about it. I feel like I can’t voice my own frustrations about it around him, or else I’ll feed his resentment.