There’s no way temperatures are this high. It’s time for an audit.

Most things in reality, we have discovered, are subject to our whims. If something is wrong, we need only decide that it isn’t, and if we can get enough people to post on Facebook supporting this view, we can probably wriggle out of it. Why should the weather be any different than any element of civic life? Why should it be so harsh and contumaciously insistent on its own reality? The answer is simple: It shouldn’t! Get some auditors in and fix it, please, before it gets any hotter!