Fourteen years ago, my then-girlfriend used a mystery plant — it looked like parsley and smelled like mint with anxiety — to make guacamole. That was my introduction to cilantro. Since then, I have become a cilantro truther. I put it on everything it makes sense with: tacos, rice, salads, sandwiches, pizza. I even once sampled a cilantro-flavor kombucha, which tasted … well, can something taste demonic?