A rare breed: Men who change their names in marriage

I think changing my name reflects one of the keys behind my 29-year marriage. Marriage is a long love affair, and it is a team in which you work together to solve problems. To be long term, each has to have the utmost respect for the other. There will always be challenges, just like in the rest of life, but having an amazing partner is key to moving through them and keeping perspective. I have been asked, “What have you both done to be married for so many years?” Distilled from advice from my grandpa and from family friend Evelyn Williams, I have two simple responses:

(1) “Do whatever is necessary to keep peace and happiness under the roof,” and

(2) “Always know your spouse is the most important family member in your life and keep him/her on a pedestal above others, which includes siding with your spouse in family disputes.”

Most people do not end up marrying their camp sweetheart, but I think there are common elements for an enduring relationship no matter where two people meet and regardless of how they managed their last names when the knot was tied.

Brian Boxer Wachler, Los Angeles